life, seasons, stress free

A season for everything.

“Liberty News” that’s literally the first thing that came into my mind after I entered the gates to my communal student accommodation.

The phrase comes from Grand Theft Auto: Liberty City, a video game staged in a makeshift New York City. I left campus about twenty minutes ago at 01:00am where I was studying for my International Law exam later on today. I had a lot on my mind, or maybe I had my head in the clouds, whatever it was it made concentration a struggle, so I decided I’d walk home and try not to flood my head with any thoughts.

So I counted my steps, every one of them. I looked down at the ground, at first the left foot fell on even numbers. But when I arrived home, the even numbers were on the right foot – I must have lost my footing along the way.

This game reminds me of a time when life was much easier than it is now. However, It wasn’t easy then so I guess it won’t get any easier. During a toilet break earlier I had wandered into thought about how all this stress comes from my struggles of being broke and trying to get rich. I realised that there is never a moment of peace because those who are rich probably spend their time stressing on how not to lose what they have.

Grand Theft Auto…those where the days, with my cousins and mates staying in a dark room all day stealing cars and racing away from police, it was all too easy – truly a grand old time.

I just can’t wait to get these exams done and dusted. I’ll go home and hopefully with something to celebrate. The last time I was there I had just got my drivers license and my mother was relieved, thinking she had got herself a mule to run her errands around town. It was all short-lived when she actually discovered my driving… all I can say is that I learnt it from Grand Theft Auto!

I’m currently 21 and how quickly the excitement of growing up has weathered away. High school was a breeze and fooled many into thinking we could actually get these degrees. Now I’m stuck in the eye of the storm, sometimes I wish I could go back to the sunny days of youth. And sometimes I wish I could just skip this stage and climb onto the one where I already have it all, planning trips to tropical vacation during the fall.

But then I stop to think, what if I get there and wish I was here? I cannot forecast the future, it’s never clear. But it’s so easy to get blown by the wind to wishing you were here and there, but I guess everything has it’s season – I hope that’s enough reason to get me off this post and into my books. The sunny days are still to come.

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17 thoughts on “A season for everything.

  1. Keep putting one foot in front of the other and keep writing. This advice would have been good for me as a 21 year old but life is a good teacher. Try to be in the moment and experience every ounce of it. You are wise in knowing that once you get to the other side, the grass might seem greener back where you originally started. Take deep breaths and try to be as grateful as possible. Wish someone would have told me what I had to learn on my own. It’s a journey and things will work themselves out. Just know, you don’t get to skip phases. You can try to rush by them so you don’t feel the pain but they will come back to bite you in the butt, eventually. Be encouraged. Thank you for sharing. Your writing is on point.

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  2. plantpicker says:

    I enjoyed this Post! And good luck with exams, I’m sure you’ll have something to celebrate when you go home!

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  3. I love this post. I’m 45 years older than you, but lately I’ve had such unsettling feelings and my thoughts are as insecure about the future. I no longer worry about gaining riches, but rather how I can get back to living happily and grateful one day at a time. It’s more about health than money. I know I’ll turn it back over to the Lord when I stop this crazy worrying, but somehow it still seems hard to turn things over. I have known those who are rich who were unhappy but I’ve also seen those who are rich who do wonderful things to help others and seem happy. I’ve known those who aren’t rich who are happy (including myself) and those who aren’t rich who are very happy (including myself). I’m going to try today to get out of my head and into my life. OH, and BTW I play the counting game, too, even today. We have a lot in common in the way we think. God bless.

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  4. I enjoyed this post. Grand Theft Auto was played by lots of people I knew one time long ago. I know your future is going to be bright sunny and happy. Keep studying and put 100 % into your exams and go home and show your family that you are going to succeed with your life choice. God bless you !!

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  5. Ah! I remember when I didn’t want to grow up!! NO…I really did not want to πŸ™‚ All I can say is there comes a time when you don’t even think about it any more and you won’t even know when it happened!
    Best of luck to you…keep working hard…you can do this!! Just think of your college time as a jail sentence…and you never have to do the time again!! And in the end it is SOOOOOO worth it!

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  6. If I can offer you a suggestion from my advanced age it would be not to worry about loosing the easier times of youth. Life gets better as you age. You will choose a path and perhaps then later choose another path. You will not worry about what is behind you and look forward to what is ahead. Leave no stones unturned. Explore life bravely. I wish you all the best.

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