South africa vs Democracy.

The case of South Africa vs Democracy.

This I know will turn into a confusing rumble of words for many readers – If anyone would even care to read past this upcoming full-stop. I blame that on our diluted education system.

So we have a country that has been devastated by 24 years of poor governance, one where public officers turned away from their constitutional obligation to serve and protect the country under the principles of transparency, accountability and accessibility.

Before that we had a system of governance based on segregation and oppression. Correct me if I am wrong on this summarised view, that system had dire effects on our current generation through, what is in my view a version of the principle of the “domino-effect”.

Okay so now we have a society that can agree that something is wrong with our government but they are split – miles apart on the best way, or in fact any way to find a solution to this matter. The route to such a solution becomes even less tangible when you look at the opposition to the current ruling party in our multi-party electoral democracy system. The official opposition, after many years of fighting against the President and his shenanigans leading to the trouble of “state capture”, have now errupted into an intra-party racial war or what-not…whatever it is…there is an unattractive division there.

While the next in line Prodigal son and his party offer what can simply be said to be the other side of the same coin as our ruling party. I had hoped that I wouldn’t spend too much time on this “background” part but I did, but it is important to know this because it has led to our current state, in which we will never find peace because you have a society that is split between loyalties and ideologies binding them to one or the other of these entities.

The Mind/Body problem.

Okay now the fun begins. What is the relationship between the mind and the Body (or between physical and mental phenomena)? “The UK band the Sugababes formed in 1998. One by one, the original members left and were replaced so that by 2009 none of the original line-up remained. In 2011, the original trio formed a new band, but the Sugababes still existed.”

This is the question of Identity. Who are we as South Africans? What kind of government to we like and which kind is too extreme for us? Apartheid came and left but it’s people and the mindsets they taught their children will live on far beyond their individual deaths. The apartheid victims will die too but their children saw the suffering and vengeance will remain somewhere within, whatever happens in this country will have to satisfy either all or none.

As you can see I can go on but you probably could not even keep up, simply jumping to this conclusion as you and I often if not always do every time we speak of politics and ideologies. So if you ask me if we will ever succeed under democracy in South Africa… I must say no. Because I have seen how our constitution works. It tries so satisfy everybody at his level in the smaller things like marriage and medium of instruction. And then it tries to bring us together on voting day expecting us to agree on common ground – never gonna happen.

This is my contribution on June 16 2018 as we South Africans celebrate ” Youth Day”. Remembering our past, with hope for our future.

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I am Fake!

All this talk about fake people around me can make one forget that I too am fake. I have to admit it but don’t get me wrong – I’m trying to be real so I can have something to be proud of.

Being stuck in the middle of the person I am and the person I want to be is probably where most people are. The self-evaluation process only gets more clouded by the inclusion of the ego into the mix.

I cannot forget the people who know me, the people I came up with on the street corners and midnight lights. How hard it is to change their perspective through a lens painted over many years of colourful memories which we once labelled “the life”.

And what about those eyes which just happened to be looking on at the very moment when I let my guard down to release some stress from the daily efforts of being a young man trying to act my age instead of my shoe size.

And all the times that I did act my shoe size but had to lock that night away in a cold, dark closet along with all the other millions of secrets I keep. You wouldn’t be wrong to label an eight for this near perfect performance.

Maybe if I fake it long enough I will make it to the border and cross it never to return to my old ways. I set my eyes on a future prospect of a me who’s word is as true as my actions, I label it faith but with every passing error, I think I might never make it.

I’ve said it before and I should say it again, I feel so blessed with a curse. Growing up looking for understanding, eventually I found it but my hands were too small to pounce onto it. So I added more strength to grip onto it but eventually the shell cracks, if only I was gentle inside, maybe my hands would be too.

So that’s the verdict, I am Fake. I cannot pick a person to tell so I leave it here in writing for whomever shall concern himself. I could not govern myself so I’ll leave it to you to judge. Until another day when I’ve plucked up the courage to achieve the dream of being real…please take good care of me as I let out this precious scream.

Fake People.

So many of us spend anxious hours thinking that something we have never had is going to bring us into greener pastures.

Failing to see that those who do have it spend sleepless hours trying to fight off the demons that come with it.

I speak in such a manner that you better hope I stay at the bottom, that way I’ll remain humble and you can excuse everything I say as unproven.

But at the end of the day, I don’t see you, don’t feel you and I certainly don’t hear you.

But I do smell you, after all I am not senseless, you smell like a Rat.

You are the type of person to instigate and conspire with us ways to reach emancipation and peace but when the time comes to cross the bridge you pull out life jackets and everyman is for himself.

That’s why I never fail to evaluate before I graduate every acquaintance, there’s degrees before speaking of friendship – if I ever let my guard down you’d probably land me in an obituary transcript.

Rubber Souls

I need those shoes with the rubber soles, they’re trendy, I think they’ll look cool. I could do with those shoes with the rubber soles to be flexible on any terrain.

I need those shoes with the rubber soles, but I could do without a rubber soul, I need to be consistent come rain or shine.

I need some walking shoes with the rubber soles just in case I need to run for my life, from these desperate criminals and maybe crooked cops. I need those shoes with the rubber soles, I saw Mandela wearing something similar on his long walk to freedom.

I need those shoes with the rubber soles, they’re comfortable enough for a walk in the park. However, if you ever want to take a walk in my shoes, don’t let the rubber soles confuse you – there’s a lot of places I’ve been that cannot be erased.

Those shoes with the rubber soles have taken me places you couldn’t imagine. In them I’ve hopped in and out of the drug dealer’s den. But those shoes with the rubber soles are priceless, they’ve gotten me so many compliments and I want that again.

Yes these are the footprints I made in my shoes with the rubber soles, they’re worn out now but I still keep them clean…if only it was as easy to do the same with my soul.

Working man.

What time is it? I don’t want to stay up too late again, it gets too tiring during the day when you don’t get enough rest at night. I learnt that lesson the hard way.

This morning the boss woke up so early and I had to be ready in a snap, I tried to cry for a little nap but she wasn’t having it. She needed to run some errands in town, this is the life of a working man and I am that working man.

We got out of the house to a beautiful Morning, I could smell the roses fresh with the dew from the night. I couldn’t smell no danger, so I was confident that today would be alright.

As we walked through the streets I was harassed, as usual by those lazy security guards. They act like they’re working but I know that it is all a performance. I know they sit by the gate all day waiting for the girls to pass by, it must be nice being professionally lazy.

Every time they see a true professional like myself walk past, they have to turn into a fracas. But I cannot lose my focus over such a circus, so I just keep on walking, doing what a trained professional like me does best.

It’s an important job this. The town can get so busy at this time of the month, and today was no exception. We’re crossing streets, red light, green light, headlight and taillight…i spot them all as we wistfully make our way through the crowds.

People are amazed at the precision I put into my work. Some doubters think I will fail, but I have my master’s confidence. We’ve been working together for over a decade, we have become family in the process. There’s no way I’m going to let her down.

We walked through the park and those pretty boys are chasing frisbees, checking out girls and enjoying picnics. I would be lying if I said I don’t envy them sometimes, but as I have told you already, I’m a determined workman and I will never allow playful desires to deter me.

We made it back home that evening to what is probably my favourite time of the day. I got my favourite treat for dessert and she gave me a much needed backrub. She sneaked in a little tickle and I gave her a kiss goodnight and she was off.

We’ll do it again tomorrow, I’ve already lost some sleep time telling you this but now that you know how busy I am, I hope you will loosen up on constantly asking why I haven’t found a bride yet.

History

It is called History because it is His.Story!

Who is he you ask? The Victor of course.

Because he lives to paint the Picture.

Dead men tell no Tales.

They’re called tall Tales because they are Far from the Truth.

Folktales because they’re told by Old folks.

And that one is called a White lie because…

Everybody believes he’s got a Proper Agenda behind his Propaganda.

Prejudice is finding a preJuiced lemon…it looks bad because you’ve already stole it’s magic.

Memoir, a memo for the future..

.a Portrait for the past.

The old Glory days – far from Holy days.

Old is Gold.

“This growing old is getting old I often find myself here thinking about the birds, the boats and past loves who flew away or started sinking” – Fun.

But growing old means getting bold and understanding your pastures better, seeing the path that life has prepared before you and finding manoeuvres that work-out and those that work you into a dugout

The older I get, the more I start to care about the things that really matter. Things like family and finding friends who lay strong foundations to weather the storm, fight fire with fire and come out stronger.

The older you get the more you see time doing what she does best, which is to reveal the things that are real. With age you begin to see the cracks on the walls and the rust on the metallic foundations that have kept you going.

And it was with getting older that I began to see my family in its true light, the perfection in the imperfections that have brought me to where I am today.

The older I get I reach that time where the shells are broke, I hatch out and start to see the cost of my evolution – understanding that life is a constant battle and appreciating the sacrifices that parents make for the sake of their children and household.

The older I get, having seen the kind mistakes I regret, the more love I begin to get as I see the selflessness of a mother trying to create a balance for her children to grow into. I begin to not only see the need to succeed for my future, but also the want in me to succeed in celebration for my history.

Oh getting old can be so cold when climbing the mountain of life, but getting old can be so gold when you reach the end of the rainbow after the rain.

Yes growing old seems like it will be a storm, but I need to do it for the sake of where I’m from. I need to do it because the village will always be judging, after seeing all that I’ve been given, I need to stand proud and proven to show that after all that’s been done, I have learnt how to perform.